Parenting by the Book may be less natural and at times even cause more difficulties when parents worries and neuroticism take over and they overworry about what they are doing right and what they are doing wrong. Fortunately most people employ warmth, understanding and what Braumrind's calls Authoritative parenting.
Below is a short article found online about Braumrind's theory on parenting styles and the impact it can have on development.
http://psychology.about.com/od/developmentalpsychology/a/parenting-style.htm
Developmental psychologists have long been interested in how parents
impact child development. However, finding actual cause-and-effect links
between specific actions of parents and later behavior of children is
very difficult. Some children raised in dramatically different
environments can later grow up to have remarkably similar personalities.
Conversely, children who share a home and are raised in the same
environment can grow up to have astonishingly different personalities
than one another.
Despite these challenges, researchers have uncovered convincing links
between parenting styles and the effects these styles have on children.
During the early 1960s, psychologist Diana Baumrind conducted a study
on more than 100 preschool-age children (Baumrind, 1967). Using
naturalistic observation, parental interviews and other
research methods, she identified four important dimensions of parenting:
- Disciplinary strategies
- Warmth and nurturance
- Communication styles
- Expectations of maturity and control
Based on these dimensions, Baumrind suggested that the majority of
parents display one of three different parenting styles. Further
research by also suggested the addition of a fourth parenting style.
The Four Parenting Styles
- Authoritarian Parenting
In this style of parenting, children are expected to follow the strict
rules established by the parents. Failure to follow such rules usually
results in punishment. Authoritarian parents fail to explain the
reasoning behind these rules. If asked to explain, the parent might
simply reply, "Because I said so." These parents have high demands, but
are not responsive to their children. According to Baumrind, these
parents "are obedience- and status-oriented, and expect their orders to
be obeyed without explanation" (1991).
- Authoritative Parenting
Like authoritarian parents, those with an authoritative parenting style
establish rules and guidelines that their children are expected to
follow. However, this parenting style is much more democratic.
Authoritative parents are responsive to their children and willing to
listen to questions. When children fail to meet the expectations, these
parents are more nurturing and forgiving rather than punishing. Baumrind
suggests that these parents "monitor and impart clear standards for
their children’s conduct. They are assertive, but not intrusive and
restrictive. Their disciplinary methods are supportive, rather than
punitive. They want their children to be assertive as well as socially
responsible, and self-regulated as well as cooperative" (1991).
- Permissive Parenting
Permissive parents, sometimes referred to as indulgent parents, have
very few demands to make of their children. These parents rarely
discipline their children because they have relatively low expectations
of maturity and self-control. According to Baumrind, permissive parents
"are more responsive than they are demanding. They are nontraditional
and lenient, do not require mature behavior, allow considerable
self-regulation, and avoid confrontation" (1991). Permissive parents are
generally nurturing and communicative with their children, often taking
on the status of a friend more than that of a parent.
- Uninvolved Parenting
An uninvolved parenting style is characterized by few demands, low
responsiveness and little communication. While these parents fulfill the
child's basic needs, they are generally detached from their child's
life. In extreme cases, these parents may even reject or neglect the
needs of their children.
The Impact of Parenting Styles
What effect do these parenting styles have on child development
outcomes? In addition to Baumrind's initial study of 100 preschool
children, researchers have conducted numerous other studies that have
led to a number of conclusions about the impact of parenting styles on
children.
- Authoritarian parenting styles generally lead to children
who are obedient and proficient, but they rank lower in happiness,
social competence and self-esteem.
- Authoritative parenting styles tend to result in children who are happy, capable and successful (Maccoby, 1992).
- Permissive parenting often results in children who rank low
in happiness and self-regulation. These children are more likely to
experience problems with authority and tend to perform poorly in school.
- Uninvolved parenting styles rank lowest across all life
domains. These children tend to lack self-control, have low self-esteem
and are less competent than their peers.
Why Do Parenting Styles Differ?
After learning about the impact of parenting styles on child
development, you may wonder why all parents simply don't utilize an
authoritative parenting style. After all, this parenting style is the
most likely to produce happy, confident and capable children. What are
some reasons why parenting styles might vary? Some potential causes of
these differences include culture, personality, family size, parental
background, socioeconomic status, educational level and religion.
Of course, the parenting styles of individual parents also combine to
create a unique blend in each and every family. For example, the mother
may display an authoritative style while the father favors a more
permissive approach. In order to create a cohesive approach to
parenting, it is essential that parents learn to cooperate as they
combine various elements of their unique parenting styles.
References
Baumrind, D. (1967). Child-care practices anteceding three patterns of preschool behavior. Genetic Psychology Monographs, 75, 43-88.
Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11(1), 56-95.
Maccoby, E. E., & Martin, J. A. (1983). Socialization in the
context of the family: Parent–child interaction. In P. H. Mussen &
E. M. Hetherington, Handbook of child psychology: Vol. 4. Socialization, personality, and social development (4th ed.). New York: Wiley.
Maccoby, E.E. (1992). The role of parents in the socialization of children: An historical overview. Developmental Psychology, 28, 1006-1017.
